Kaoru Oshima, from Japan’s first “male porn actress” to author

Kaoru Oshima made a huge splash when he debuted in the adult film industry in 2014 as the first otokonoko (male-to-female crossdressing) adult film star. He (we are assuming Oshima goes by “he”) retired from the porn industry at age 25 the following year and has since expanded his career as a TV personality and writer, similar to the likes of Minamo, who recently debuted as a novelist ahead of her retirement from JAV.

Having entered the industry via gay adult videos as a biological male, why did Oshima shift his focus to mainstream adult films as a femboy performer? Oshima sat for an interview with entertainment media Encount, and we have translated some edited highlights.

“If you ask whether I’m a man or a woman, I’m definitely a man,” he says. “I haven’t undergone surgery or hormone therapy, nor do I have any desire to change my legal gender. But my sexual orientation differs slightly from that of the average man. I live honestly, acknowledging the feeling that I don’t want to become a woman.”

Oshima first realized his sexual orientation at the age of 15. He grew up with internet access at home and exposed to various forms of erotica and pornography. “I was aware that I was tolerant of most sexual kinks,” he jokes. But his insecurities led him to discover crossdressing.

“In junior high, the only thing I cared about was how to have sex. I was short, chubby, and had naturally curly hair. I was pessimistic about my life, convinced I’d never get a girlfriend. That’s when I discovered a crossdressing message board online. I saw middle-aged men in their thiries being fawned over and treated like young girls. If did that, I thought, I’d be even more popular. Or rather, it was like I felt that crossdressing was my only option.”

He had his first sexual encounter with a middle-aged man he met through an anonymous message board when he was just 15. However, after entering high school, he also dated women. While he had no aversion to having sex with men, he came to terms with the fact that his romantic and sexual attractions were strictly directed toward women. (This is not unusual in Japan: various male sex workers have sex with male clients but consider themselvesl straight.)

At 18, Oshima applied for a job performing in gay adult videos to earn money. He took an overnight bus from his hometown of Osaka to Tokyo, filmed three videos over the course of three days, and received a payment of around ¥200,000, which is about a month’s salary for someone in their early twenties.

“It was a novel experience to see that even these kinds of videos had proper directors and assistant directors. I had intended for it to be a one-time thing, but everyone else was a terrible actor. So much so that we had to stifle our laughter while working together. It felt a bit like a school festival. I actually enjoyed it. I didn’t feel any sense of tragedy or shame about selling my body, so I started participating in shoots every now and then.”

A major turning point arrived when he was 23. Oshima was scraping by on income from temporary call-center work and doing video appearances. He starred in a full-scale femboy video, a joint production between a mainstream adult video AV company and a gay adult video studio. The video became an unprecedented hit, leading to a flood of offers for similar roles.

“I’m not gay, I just don’t mind having sex with men. Acting in gay adult videos always felt like just that, acting. I treated it strictly as a job. On the other hand, when I was fully made up and dressed as a woman, hearing people compliment my looks really flipped a switch in me. I started wanting to break out and gain popularity.”

He even began cross-dressing in his daily life to refine his look and applied to an AV production agency, and gained attention on social media for shirtless photos. In 2014, he signed an exclusive contract with a major agency and made a high-profile debut in the mainstream AV industry, eventually appearing in over 30 titles within two years. But Oshima was aware that any career in the adult video and gay video industries has a limited lifespan.

After that exclusive contract ended, Oshima faced a choice: take on more intense shoots as a freelancer for specific projects, or leverage his fame to explore a new path. He chose the latter and retired, releasing a photo book and pivoting to a second career as a writer.

“My photo book one didn’t show any genitals and wasn’t even rated 18, but it was dismissed as just an erotic book. Bookstores refused to stock it, online retailers flagged it as adult content, and TV appearances were cancelled at the last minute. It made me painfully realize that once you’ve done AV, society no longer treats you like a normal human being.”

In 2023, Oshima sued the production company, seeking to halt the sale and distribution of her past works. Such actions have become easier for performers since the passing of new legislation about porn in Japan, and the precedent set by other suits by performers. A settlement was reached this past February.

Now established as a writer, Oshima pens various columns in adult magazines and also interviews current AV stars.

He warns against future performers rushing into JAV. “I don’t go so far as to regret doing AV, but I was naive. Porn is far more organized than the public imagines, yet there is no denying it remains an industry that defies conventional norms. Unless you’re fully prepared for what lies ahead, this isn’t a place to come out of mere curiosity. The lowering barrier to entry is a problem. There are certainly cases where agencies cover the cost of plastic surgery to launch a performer’s career, only for them to end up hooked on host clubs.”

Oshima sees it as part of his duty to be honest about his bad experiences. “Sharing the hell I witnessed, and the hell others endured, is one of the things I can do now.”