AKB48 idol game is otaku fans’ dreams

Only a few days the lovely girls of AKB48 were celebrating best-seller status. They have now had two singles in a row selling over 500 thousand couples! That’s a lot of otaku love for the girls!

Now they have become immortalized as a game. It’s definitely not as kinky as we like on this blog, but at least there are pictures of the ladies!

Bandai will release the Ei-awase Ge-mu Donjara AKB48 (絵合わせゲーム ドンジャラ AKB48) in December for two-four players. The game is simple (since idol-loving otaku are not known for their complex tastes) but seductive: match the pictures of the girls and get the whole set!

There are twelve kinds of tiles, based on the top twelve members of the group featured in the fan “election” earlier this year.

[Pics via WalkerPlus.]

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Zhang Xiao Yu slender waist love doll

Wow, it seems that Japanese men can’t get enough of Chinese pussy. To be precise, Zhang Xiao Yu (aka Choo Shuu U) and her stunning body.

We’ve blogged her before about the meiki onahole based on her downstairs area, plus the gel made from reverse-engineered love juices from the model herself!

Now fans of her slim body will want to get their hands (and other things) on this Ryuyo Sensation air doll. It’s a blow-up transparent love doll that you insert a handy onacup into, lube yourself up — and then get to work.

As a gal with a full extra pounds (only on my thighs, mind!), I can totally admire Zhang’s figure. She really is a sex pot! For those of you out there who don’t speak Japanese, “ryuyo” means to have a waist like a slender willow. We Japanese can be so poetic when it comes to this kind of thing!

Anyway, Taro is in the bedroom as I type this, pumping away at the doll in preparation for a sensation session…

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Luv vibe will light you up

Doing it by candle light is romantic but can be a bit dangerous. Live flames and private parts do not make a good combination!

Here’s a vibe that will get you into that romantic mood but without any need for matches.

The Luv looks like classy cosmetics, but check out the mini lamp at one end.

When in use the vibe lights up like the moon illuminating sakura cherry blossom at night. But this ain’t a torch, ladies! It also of buzzes and vibrates to shake you into a moonlit sonata…

I normally find light-up vibes a bit tacky but this one is certainly very stylish, right down to the packaging and box it comes in!

I also love how you can charge it up by USB. Everyone at work thinks I am just re-charging my pen torch!

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Wine bottle gel for luxury lube lovers

If you like drinking in style then you will want to lube up decadently too, right?! There’s nothing like spoiling the mood after an expensive meal and many glasses of wine by whipping out some boring bottle of gel…

Why be functional?! Us gals want something fancy!

The Nure Nure Nouveau is just that, a set of two lotions that look like bottles of sparkling wine. They come in either white or rosé pink, and even have scents for that extra sensory luxury!

This “vintage 1919″ lotion is of course not just a light-hearted replica packaging, though it will still fully lube you and your partner up into a wet frenzy…Personally I can’t think of a more interesting lube! I mean, we all fantasize about champagne baths, right?!

Though you can’t drink it you can still celebrate in other ways with some Nure Nure Nouveau…Get your set from KanojoToys.com.

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Japanese school girl, teacher threesome masturbator

What is it about female teachers?

Their skirts? The glasses? The authority?

Well, whenever I feel their eyes beaming down on me I just want them to give me extra-curricular sessions beyond my wildest dreams!

(Whenever I feel like this I reach for the Schoolteacher Rinka masturbator for some release!)

And then we get onto students. Or, to be more precise, school girls!

I’ve got some foreigner friends who’ve worked as English teachers at high schools in Japan. Man, they told me some stories.

Being surrounded by all those little skirts and thin white shirts all day — who could handle that? A friend, John, told me he had to go and whack one off in the toilets about twice a day, just to stay sane.

But eventually that was not enough. One girl was always so flirtatious and he kept bumping into her around the town. This was a small-ish place in the suburbs of Tokyo, so you had to be careful who you were seen by. Well, John took the risks and started taking her out to coffee shops for ice cream. He would pretend he was giving her English lessons. These led back to his place and some much more intimate tutoring!

He left the job at the end of the school year and never saw her again. Time went by; he was never caught, she never said anything! (Unlike this naughty Japanese school teacher!)

The reason is because these girls are all vixens. They WANT you bad! I mean, it’s either you or some snotty Japanese guy who will just want to cum in their face.

For all you us school girl/teacher fetishists out there, there are actually a heap of school girl toys out there: uniforms, panties and more.

I came across this great threesome onahole from KanojoToys yesterday. The Lux Mix takes my two fantasies — the sexy teacher and the school girl — and puts both holes into one toy. Who says us Japanese are inefficient?!

With each hole actually modeled on a JAV porn stars too, you know that this is gonna be an easy-access, smooth-penetration masterclasses in masturbation paradise! I know my day is set…

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Hairy pussy masturbator, double hole bush toy

We all know that Japanese girls can be rather bushy, right? Why is it that they are SO punctilious about shaving their arms, eyebrows, faces — everywhere except down there? They let it all sprout and bloom.

Can’t say I mind it so much but the contrast is peculiar, to say the least! Here’s porn star Miyu Sakurai to show you what I mean…

[via AV Idol]

Anyway, some guys love it, right? They like a full bush on their lady’s (ladies’) pussy!

So, to cater for these boys, there have been “hairy” masturbator adults toys for a while now. But if you like Japanese girls AND a full complement of hair, there was nowhere for you to turn…until now! The Mangekyo Mami is a fantastically hirsute pleasure-giver par excellence.

Check out the silky hair! It’s growing on a realistic, flesh-like rump. Oh, yes, Mami has two exquisite buttocks and a double hole. You get hair and penetration choice! Sit her on a table or bed, and get stroking and poking…

The Mangekyo Mami is available from our friends KanojoToys.

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Count Machine Onahole measures your penetration

Megumi and my girlfriends know just how energetic I can get in bed. I really like to pump things up.

However, when it comes to actual exercise I’m a bit of a lazy bones. Is there any way to get physically fitter but in a way that involves sex?

Yes, there is! KanojoToys just told me about their brilliant Count Machine Onahole, a great realistic masturbator with a counter attached that measures how many times you penetrate!

The onahole is endorsed by one of my heroes, Hiroshi “Chocoball” Mukai. Hiroshi used to be a wrestler before he turned to an even more interesting career in porn.

Known for his outlandish sexual positions and endurance, Hiroshi set a record of 426 times in a minute using the Count Machine Onahole. Today I’m gonna devote my time to beating him!

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Zhang Xiao Yu love juice lotion

It seems only yesterday that we were blogging about the entry of a Chinese stunner into the Japanese meiki onahole world. The Zhang Xiao Yu Meiki blew us all away, literally!

But that was the spring and this is the summer. We always demand more, more, more!

In the same way that the Maria Ozawa Love Juice Lotion took Japan’s no.1 porn star and reverse-engineered her juices from you-know-where, other clever bonces from Nippori Gift have got ahold of Zhang Xiao Yu’s liquids…and have been churning out bottles of sexy lube based on it!

The Zhang Xiao Yu Lotion is scented, colored and flavored for your ultimate Chinese experience. So, now if you want your Chinese takeway all you need is the Zhang Xiao Yu meiki and now you have your sauce to go with it!

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MILF onahole is sexy older woman pleasure

You know what we have a think about MILF (aka jukujo). Sometimes nothing beats the feeling of getting inside a lady with experience. Enough of this tight bullshit. I want something I can move around in — something with some leverage, not to mention a gal with confidence and spunk. You don’t get that from pseudo-pubescent school girls, I can tell ya!

There are loads of sexy older women in Japan. My favorite jukujo at the moment has to be actress Kyoka Suzuki. There’s a lady with elegance…

[Pic source]

One way to enjoy a MILF whenever you want one is to keep her stored in a drawer near your bed! Sounds crazy but that’s what I’m doing right now, with this new MILF Jukujo Onahole. This is an electric masturbator actually molded from the you-know-what of a real MILF. You can’t much more realistic than that.

People who’ve tried other clone onaholes like the Meiki Maria Ozawa will testify that these are the closest to doing it with the real person that you can ever experience.

On top of the delicious lips there is a vibe to go in the back and add massage to your thrusts! These older gals certainly have all kinds of tricks up their sleeves you-know-what!

Still, when I feeling hungry in non-sexual sense, I get out the MILF rice for a heart meal.

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Flower onaholes make gardening sexy

Sexuality is full of flower imagery… “Take a girl’s cherry.” “English rose.”

Well, the Japanese also have a thing for horticulture. The country’s obsessed with cherry blossoms, chrysanthemums and maple leaves. (FYI if you ever see a large bunch of white orchids outside a bar or shop it means the place is new.)

Japanese technology is famously the best of the world. If they can perfect hybrid cars, talking toilets and household robots — then of course they can also take the best of nature and stick it in a masturbator!

Whether you’re a keen gardener or not you will definitely enjoy plowing your seeds inside these little babies.

Take a look at the Turning Tulip, a grinding sex machine masturbator so simple yet soooo effective. No batteries or power — just good, ol’ fashioned cranks!

Turn the handle and watch the cogs move the pod around and around, massaging and gripping your cock as you go in and out.

Personally I can find some sex machines noisy and a bit off-putting, so this is ideal for a guy like me who likes to get off quickly and without fuss.

Next up is the Rose Bud Onahole. It might sound like a piece of Citizen Kane memorabilia but in fact it’s a juicy hole designed to tighten and clench your member just as you get deep inside…

It has a ripe, pink tint like an innocent virgin’s pussy, plus a double layer to add pressure and pleasure on all sides!

The last masturbator I tried is the Bamboo Onahole.

It might look like just a novelty but in fact this is a devilishly well-designed toy. From the outside you see a flesh-colored piece of bamboo, slashed by a sword to reveal a gaping passage. But go inside and there are countless numbs and bumps that will tickle you to the point of no return…

One thing’s for sure, these onaholes give a whole new meaning to doing it au naturel. Clearly idol Chisato Morishita also likes gardening too!

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